2009, I won't forget you!!

2009, an amazing year.
The year with tears & laughter, with sweet & bitter and with you and me together!!!

I want to dedicate this post to peoples that had inspired me in 2009!
There's 12 of you I wanna thanks.
Each one for each month of 2009.

~The one that I had always admire & will be my role model for the rest of my life.
~The one that taught me what is LOVE.
~The one that had accompany me at the darkest moment.
~The one that totally turned me crazy.
~The one that I feel most linked to from deep in my soul.
~The one that made me proud to be a HP nerd!
~The one that had change my life.
~The one that really cares about me.
~The one that I like so much.
~The one that know me so well.
~The one that belongs to my world.
~The one that I love most!

For these 12 peoples that had make my 2009 an unforgettable year.
I LOVE YOU, guys!!!

L *AME

NOTE: The "*" is silent.

I thought I was stupid. Apparently, I am not the stupidest.

Ever since the unexpected & preposterous truth revealed, I've totally lost my confidence and dependence on my supernatural sixth sense. (well, you can laugh) Someone who disappeared _ months ago... perhaps it wasn't that obvious. However, I think it's him, or should I say I know it's him - it's as clear as day. I tried to fool myself by telling myself, "uh! it can't be him, that's way too coincident. There must be someone she fell in love with behind everyone's back!" Sadly, my heart was not willing to coordinate with my mind.

Such an awful blunder which you could only regret of it hopelessly. Just looking back at me, I was lucky, ashamedly lucky. A decision could be irreversible, an irreversible decision could cause an irretrievable loss. I am glad I didn't know this earlier, didn't know this while I wasn't in a good condition to know. If I knew this at that particular time, I probably would have hated myself badly.

Once again, I was lucky, unfairly lucky.

The most beautiful and most irritated quote:
I love you but I don't deserve you.

Christmas Special ~ 火柴的心声( 十二)

又是圣诞节。又是寂寞的夜。又想起去年的这个时候。。。
又一年咯！都不同了，都改变了。
一样的星空，一样的转动，一样的心跳。

不幸的男孩，脑中永远不会再出现可悲的女孩，心中也再不会挂念多余的女孩。
执着的男孩学会了忍受，更懂得放松，目标却重不改变。
可悲的女孩呢？忘了不幸的男孩吗？眼里还装得下执着的男孩吗？
多余的女孩呢？应该怎么做？应该如何面对不幸的男孩？该怎样慰问可悲的女孩？




你好吗？那个九个月前消失的你，现在,幸福吗？祝你圣诞节快乐。 ~ from 不再存在于你心中的人 (sodame)
Merry Christmas!! Keep an eye on Santa ^-^ ~ from 不应该出现的人
Merry Christmas & Happy New Year. Wish you always be happy. ~ frOm the One that stiLL & WiLL aLWays be Waiting.

愛不單行

找不到人說
心裡的寂寞
找不到人懂
怕黑的折磨
找不到命中注定
在一起的那个人
很多人都像我
一個人過生活

愛
只有簡單筆畫
卻比想像複雜
恨安定愛變化
我愛過幾個人
也被愛過幾遍
卻還是沒能將幸福留下

愛
是不可数的嗎
為何我還相信
它不是獨行俠
我在等一個人
在等我的永恒
告訴我
愛不單行
別害怕

用不完身邊
氾濫的自由
開始怕孤單
是一種詛咒
羨慕我能飛的人
為何在天黑以後
還是寧願回到
愛情那個枷鎖

我在等一個人
在等我的永恒
告訴我
愛不單行
相信它

傻

等待，
很傻吗？
不需要任何人知晓，
不奢望你的回头，
不干涉你的人生。
我不是被动，
而是害怕伤痛。


逃避，
很傻吗？
面对，
不定能解决。
逃避，
又何成不是一种
低风险的解决方式？
我不是没有勇气，
只是选择了安静。


坚持，
很傻吗？
有谁
能预知未来？
现在的NO，
或许是明日的YES。
我不想死缠着你，
但请不要剥夺
我爱你的权力。


留恋，
很傻吗？
如果真有忘情水，
我愿意用尽一切换取它。
藕断丝连，
有谁会比我痛？
我想忘掉，
又有谁能帮我？

Trying to Stop Living Like Luna

For a while now, I've been one of those girls who could never live up to the expectations of this world, and never really tried to anyway. For a while now, I've never cared what everyone else thinks. This is going to stop. I think it's time to stop living too much like Luna Lovegood. It's time to care what everyone else thinks and not just be what I like to be. It's time to hear what other people's thoughts about me and try to take it.

I used to think more like this but now I am going to try on something like this. I don't think I'll ever stop thinking that someone is better than me, but I'll just put that out of my head. From now on, I will always appreciate and love the people who like me no matter how nerdy and unattractive I am. Only the tolerant people. And I'm going to remember that, no matter how obnoxious and ugly I am, God and my family and my true friends will always love me.

I'll still dress how I want, but I will open to MORE options. Now, I am going to start pleasing everyone around me. As long as I stay a good person, there is no reason to feel bad about some changes.

What my birth month say about me...

For Evanna Lim who birth on month August below are What Your Birth Month Says About You :

* Loves to joke
* Attractive
* Suave and caring
* Brave and fearless
* Firm and has leadership qualities
* Knows how to console others (instead of knw I think I like to)
* Too generous and egoistic
* Taked high pride of oneself
* Thirsty for praises
* Extraodinary spirit
* Easily angered
* Angry when provoked
* Easily jealous
* Observant
* Careful and cautious
* Thinks quickly
* Independent thoughts
* Loves to lead and to be led
* Loves to dream
* Talented in the arts, music and defence
* Sensitive but not petty
* Poor resistance against illnesses T_T
* Learns to relax
* Hasty and rushy
* Romantic
* Loving and caring
* Loves to make friends

PRIVATE PIC

A few day before when I was cleaning up my room, I found something that's useless but not meaningless.It was my photo... also called as X-ray.



There's a bunch of X-rays in this bag.



All X-rays are in these big envelopes.... got UM Hospital & Assunta Hospital & others.




Receipts & appointment card...





I realized that I got this disease when I was 6. ---- SCOLIOSIS

Definition:
Amedical condition in which a person's spine is curved from side to side, shaped like an "s" or "c", and may alsobe rotated.To adults it can be very painful. It is an abnormal lateral curvature of the spine. On anx-ray, viewed from the rear, the spine of an individual with a typical scoliosis may look more like an "S" or a "C" than a straight line.It is typically classified as congenital (caused by vertebral anomalies present at birth), idiopathic (sub-classified as infantile, juvenile, adolescent, or adult according to when onset occurred) or as neuromuscular, having developed as a secondary symptom of another condition, such as spina bifida, cerebral palsy, spinal muscular atrophy or due to physical trauma. [from Wikipedia]

HERE is just some of it.

OCT 1999

JAN 2000

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AUG 2000

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MAY 2002

DEC 2002

SEPT 2003


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APR 2004

The curve became more serious. In 2006, I had a surgery.
Sugery is usually indicated

for curves that have a high likelihood of progression, curves that cause a significant amount of pain with some regularity, curves that would be cosmetically unacceptable asan adult, curves in patients with spina bifida and cerebral palsy that interfere with sitting and care, and curves that affect physiological functions such as breathing.

Surgery is usually required with a curve of 40 to 50 degrees but I waited until 80 degrees because once the surgery is done the height is 80 to 90 percent fixed.So, I waited after the puberty.

The surgery involves a combination of rods, screws, human made bones and wires fixing the spine and can apply stronger, safer forces to the spine than the Harrington rod. This technique is known as the Cotrel-Dubousset instrumentation, currently the most common technique for the procedure.

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***** after surgery *****

NOW...

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MARCH 2006

my favourite one...

This X-rays is to estimate the age of the growth of bones.

MAY 2006

OCT 2006